Serving With the Right Heart

It always amazes me when I see a mom maintain not only a blog, but a blog about doing things yourself. Like this:

Cute isn't it? But, how does she have the time to maintain a home, raise her kids, love her husband and make burlap wreaths--THEN tell the world about it? Well, I'm sure she would say she doesn't do it all because she is some super-human. I'm slowly seeing that there are many talented women out there that do things differently than me, and not because they have some secret hidden power. I believe they have found their gift, embraced it and use it to the glory of God. Okay, the last is assuming they have moved from appreciating God's common grace into His saving grace. But, the point is, I need to stop looking at other people's gifts with envy and sadness and start praising God for what He has given me, then rejoice and use it.

I posted a facebook status the other day that said: Has a burden to minister in my season of child-rearing. How to balance it all? By God's grace. Romans 1:16. This sparked a lot of thumbs-ups and several comments that reminded me of my first and foremost area of ministry: my children and husband. My kids need to be raised in the truth and knowledge of Jesus Christ. My husband needs my support and encouragement to walk worthy of the Lord. Together, we need to raise our kids with a purpose to make much of God. I can not agree more. This time of having my little ones at home is fleeting and I better not get so involved with the church that I neglect my family.

But, having said that, I also can't get so wrapped in my family that I neglect the church. Though I have four children, I am not too busy to serve. There's a reason for why I think I'm not serving or serving enough. Because I look at what others are doing and I compare my talent to their talent. I have spiritual envy. Instead of rejoicing over the gifts of my fellow brother and sister, I pine for the same talent or sulk at the inability to do it their way. How sinful.

God did not make a mistake when He made us. Each has a unique gift and a season to use it in. As I manage my home I want to be more aware of the little eyes watching me and make sure I am making so much of God, that I become invisible. These little ones will learn more by my actions than my words. So I pray I will become a doer of the word and not a hearer only.

Lord, help me keep this burden to serve continually before you. I need direction and gospel-centered motive so you will be glorified and magnified. Satisfy my longing heart with your steadfast love, grace and mercy. In Jesus' name.

Jesus and the Rose

Last week Doug and I started listening to Matt Chandler's sermon: A Shepherd and His Unregenerate Sheep from the Desiring God Conference '09. From the moment he started talking, I was intrigued and amused. He has a passionate love for the Lord and is a good preacher.

In his opening, he shared his background and one particular story that I want to share with you. As a young Christian, his heartbeat was to share the gospel and lovingly become intertwined in sinner's lives for the purpose of sharing God's grace and mercy. Then, he ran into an enemy: The church.



Tell me if you can relate. Not with how the church has failed to communicate truth, but how you personally have failed to handle God's word with reverent, humble, utter dependence on the Spirit to reveal that truth.

God has been doing a work in my own life, showing me how I was living by tradition and not by the simple truth of God's own word. I too, have tried to make a biblical point outside of the gospel. The results were confusing at best and left me looking like a know-it-all, unloving "religious freak".

I echo the prayer of my church that we crawl over the rubble and get into our community with one. simple. message. The gospel of Jesus Christ.

Character First or Christ First?

Wanting your kids to have good character is not a bad thing. In fact, I pursued this approach when I thought about raising Emily. But if this is the main focus, the danger in that is the focus is on external behavior and attitudes, and not on the most important target-the heart. Sure, I want my kids to learn dependability, courage, truthfulness, kindness, etiquette, joyfulness, hard work, perseverance, self-control, gentleness, forgiveness, honesty, loyalty, orderliness, serving, responsibility, determination, initiative, decisiveness, and more.

But, THE MOST IMPORTANT THING I WANT MY KIDS TO LEARN IS THIS: they have a wicked heart, deceitful above all things and they are full of sin, desirous to live a life completely opposite of these character qualities. And, that sin of selfish rebellion is deserving of God's righteous wrath. Not a popular thing to bring before your kids. We're tempted to tell them stories of Daniel in the lion's den and dare them to be a Daniel-drawing on strength from God. Or the courage of David, as he faced Goliath and had faith in God. Ruth is seen as the loyal daughter-in-law that was blessed as an apparent reward for her faithfulness and determination. But these stories make the wrong person the hero.

The best thing I have learned is to see God's Word as a complete story, not a bunch of moral lessons grouped together. But, one story about One Person. One Savior. The only thing we can relate to in these stories is the complete helplessness, sinful, alienated state we find our characters in. But God, being rich in mercy has saved us in Jesus Christ.

Every story points to Christ. He is the Way, the Truth and the Life. He is what reconciles us to our Creator. He is the author and finisher of our faith. The gospel must be God-centered, not man-centered.

And, if God so chooses to open our little ones' eyes, they will learn through the sanctification process to become humble, meek, and loving-you know, all those character qualities we listed above.

This is a much easier process. Live a gospel-centered life, always pointing your kids to the cross and the outward will reflect on the inward transformation. But, beware. If you focus primarily on outward actions, you run a high risk of creating one good bluffer. And what a dangerous place to be-to not know your child's heart.

Lord bless you as you raise your little ones.

Oh, and in no way have I mastered this!! :)

Three for Thursday

Three topics for today:

Tell people you love Jesus:

These words prompted me to take Desiring God up on an incredible offer to purchase 48 copies of John Piper's book: Seeing and Savoring Jesus Christ at a buck a piece plus $20.00 shipping so I can share with others why we celebrate this time of year.

Each year I think most Christians (should be all) want to help their friends and family members not lose sight of the truth behind Christmas. It's all about Jesus. But if you're like me, finding a creative, inexpensive way to do that is, well, challenging.

From the back of the book it says, "John Piper has written this book in the hope that all will see Jesus for who he really is and will come to enjoy him above all else." This really struck a chord on my heart strings. Oh, how I want to have everyone taste and see that the Lord is good.

Even for my own heart I desire to have fresh ammo for my proverbial tool belt that can be used when I doubt, sin, and lose faith. Another quote from the book: "If you don't savor Christ, you haven't seen Christ for who he is." WOW! Do my actions, deeds and words show my children, my neighbors, the world that I'm savoring Christ above all else because I see him? I can see him without really seeing him. I want my spiritual eyes to be opened so that when I savor him, I know I've seen him.

This year, I'll be handing out these books. Maybe I'll have a blog giveaway. So, one of you lucky six people have the chance of getting this great little book. :o)

No matter how you say Merry Christmas this year, do it with passion, boldness and truth.

Earning the right

I am not a good time manager. I try to be organized but I'm lazy. I want to read the Word daily and with purpose but the computer draws me away. These are the reasons I got off Facebook a year or so ago. I would get wrapped up in the Wall, throwing sheep, photos, comments and who is friends with whom. It's so addicting.

Well, in this little break I've realized that getting organized isn't a laborious chore, it's a joyful exercise. Don't get me wrong, it is work but it's the kind of work that has great rewards. Now, let me just say right now that I am certainly no organizing junkie or perfect mom who has it all together. I still waste time and battle laziness. But it's getting easier to recognize it and do something about it.

I can see the working of the Holy Spirit in my life that gently prompts me to yearn more for God than for GMail and blogs. So, what works for me is to "earn the right" to be on the computer. Have I seen what God has to say to me before I run to see who has the funniest status? Have I managed my family before staring at my laptop?

My goal, through the work of the Spirit, is to always sit at Jesus' feet before going to Internet. All are welcome to ask me if I've been in the Word first when you see me online. And if you are reading this before you have opened the Words of Life, may I kindly suggest you turn the computer off and go taste and see that the Lord is good?

One last comment. I'm not sure how long I'll stay on Facebook. The advertisements in the sidebar really aren't the most glorifying to God, are they?

Looking our best

One of my favorite blogs is Simple Mom dot net. She's a minimalist who shares ideas on frugality, organization and great mom tips. Here's a recent post that has some practical, tangible ways to looking our best. These aren't shallow, high-fashion tips straight from the NY runway, but easy-to-do and helpful when we moms don't feel our best. Check it out: http://simplemom.net/10-tips-for-looking-your-best/.

My Cup Runneth Over

It is the end of another day. The kids are in bed, the dishes are done (thanks, Nana) and I don't have a pile of laundry on my bed waiting to be shuffled to the couch so I can have a place to sleep. I am so incredibly blessed. As I look back at the last couple of days, I'm reminded anew of how great my God is and how small I am. His loving kindness does not end and as He reveals Himself to me, I am in awe that He would choose to save me and not only redeem me, but continue to work in me with love and patience even when I mess up. There are many vessels and avenues God uses to sanctify me and the one He used today was my dearest friend, my husband.

My dear hubby is married to the worst person I know. I was gone last week from Thursday afternoon to Saturday early evening learning, laughing and crying with the ladies of my church as we retreated in beautiful Lincoln City, OR. This ladies retreat was built on the study of Titus 2. In this familiar passage, we are exhorted as women to love our husbands with a tender, passionate kind of love. A phileo kind of love. This is particularly hard because sometimes I get caught up in serving and miss out on cultivating tender thoughts and cherishing my Sweety.

Today was no exception and I'm not ashamed to show my sinful side because grace abounded more and the longer you know me, you'll see the sinful side yourself as I am still being molded and shaped to come into the presence of my great God and King.

Okay, so here's how it went. While I was away at the retreat, Doug decided to surprise me by adding some much needed cabinets in our utility room for added storage. We are simplifying our home and this storage is needed for the large supply of paper towel and toilet paper rolls we get from Costco-among other things. It will get things off the floor and behind clean, white doors. So, Doug installed the cabinets, cleaned the floor and waited with eagerness to show off his hard work.

His hard work was greatly appreciated when I came home from a sleep-deprived weekend. It looked so neat and clean and I was very impressed at his efforts. That was Saturday. Sunday came and went with godly conversations and heart-to-heart talks on what I learned at the retreat and how excited I was to put some things into action and even this morning we had a wonderful time of prayer together before going about our busy Monday. Then, I heard the bomb. Doug informs me that in his installing/cleaning frenzy, he failed to bring in several items from the utility room back indoors...out of the rain...Great, now my schedule is all janked up because of him.

Grrr! All the loving, warm thoughts I had for my husband were gone. The closeness I felt from prayer-vanished. I was livid. I'm out in the cold pulling in cleaning supplies, a pack-in-play, goodwill items that were in a bag, a silver-plated cake stand, shelves, and a bag of keepsakes that were baby cards and drawings from the girls. This is what put me over the edge. I didn't hesitate to tell Doug that his efforts were careless and reckless. I pulled them in, and sharply told my mom that they needed to dry out as she asked what she could do to help.

I remember specifically saying out loud, I do not want to forgive him. The Lord then asked, "What would you do if I said that to you?" But Lord you did forgive me. "So then, you must forgive Doug." I can't! Please help me, I say. Just then my friend Jennifer calls and I lament to her at how angry I am and yet how I desire to do what's right. It's hard I tell her. I know I need to forgive the way Christ forgave me but that's not some magic formula that works instantly. She was very wise to advice me to let it cool and pointed out that sometimes in these situations she has found that she has been at fault once she gave time to think about it. I quickly concluded that it wasn't my fault. I was out of town.

Now, you may wonder what the big deal is. So he forgot to bring in a few things. They dry, right? And so what if you lose out on a few keepsakes? There will be more. Well, I'd say to you that you have a lot more self-control than I do but that's slowly changing. You see, as I went to the table to see what damage was done I noticed that a.) the papers were bone dry and b.) this is the part where God really does a work in my heart...it wasn't my bag of keepsakes. It was garbage!! Yep. I lost it over trash. There were drawings in there but not ones worth keeping. I'm up to my eyeballs in precious scribblings from my children. What I must have seen was the colorful bag the cards used to be kept in and the decorative Build-A-Bear birth certificates that made me think it was a bag of treasure.

Oh, the shame of it all. Thankfully (and I don't use that word lightly here) I have a gracious husband who allowed me to sincerely apologize without making me feel worse than I did and two that I have a loving, forgiving, heavenly Father. He keeps His promises when I pray for Him to work in my life so that I become the wife he wants me to be.

How I love to end a day without shame. Without guilt. Confession is good for the soul.

Motivation for Christian Living

sermon notes from Applications from the Mockings of Jesus 9-21-08 Hanafee

Two things will motivate us to live upright and godly lives. One is guilt. The other is gratitude. When guilt is the motive, we're like a 4th of July sparkler. It's like holding a wick to a stick of dynamite. The flame ignites lots of productive activity that looks appealing but instead of burning down to something explosive, it just fades out and is dead. I've been here many times. A sermon will prick my heart and stir my spirit. I feel the weight of a Holy God looking down on me in disgust and I crawl out from under my rock and pull myself up and say, "Okay, Lord. From now on, I'm going to do better." Then, reality sets in. I sin. And the cycle starts all over again. This routine is not only defeating but un-biblical.

Romans 8:1(ESV) says: "There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus." my emphasis added. This is the key for seeking sanctification with a heart of gratitude. Thanking God for what He has done for us. But what does that look like and how can we protect our minds from believing the lies that make us think a.)we have the ability to change and b.)God is looking down with disapproving nods so we better get our act together.

First, read Mark 15:16-21. Then, ask yourself, "What does the gospel bring to bear in this fight for sanctification?" Let's look at 4 cross-centered weapons.

1. If Christ went through all of this for me, He will not forsake me in my trials and struggles. Being a Christian, doesn't mean we will be perfect but it also doesn't mean we can't have victory. After failing time and time again in one area it's easy to think we will never overcome. We think we have to just settle for this "lot in life." We give up and quit in that particular area. Let's see what the Bible reminds us. Isaiah 49:15b-16a (ESV) says, "...yet I will not forget you. Behold, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands." Romans 8:32 (ESV) says, "He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?" See, when we give up and are content to not allow the Spirit to work in those difficult areas of sin, we are saying Christ's work wasn't good enough. Listen, Christ died for sin. Period.

2. Drop the shame. We carry a backpack of shame that's not ours to carry. We need to preach to ourselves the atoning work of Christ. My study Bible writes, "An atonement is a reconciliation of alienated parties, the restoration of a broken relationship. Atonement is accomplished by making amends, blotting our offenses, and giving satisfaction for wrongs done." It continues, "According to Scripture every person sins and needs to make atonement, but lacks the power and resources for doing so. We have offended our Creator, who's nature is to hate sin (Jer. 44:4; Hab 1:13) and to punish it (Ps. 5:4-6; Rom. 1:18, 2:5-9.)" Christ is our atoning sacrifice. He paid the ransom and absorbed God's wrath. The weight of our sin is no longer on us. When we do sin, confess, repent and then rest in God's grace. 1 John 1:9

3. When we are tempted to sin, we need to think of His mocking. Call to mind the scene in Mark 15:16-21. The King of kings and Lord of lords endured brutality and shame and was rejection for sin. My sin. Your sin. Protect your mind. Don't indulge the place in your mind that is a secret place for sin. Do everything possible to keep the gospel in the forefront of your mind. Endeavor to live in the gospel. Remember, the gospel is not a door. It's a building. A place we go into for healing, rejoicing and a place to be armed. Our chief end is to glorify God and enjoy Him forever.

4. When our motivation to live a holy like comes from gratitude and not guilt, we have the makings of radical living. Christ went outside the camp to face reproach for us. He has asked us to treasure Him above all else. He will not leave us or forsake us. Heb. 13:5

Are you struggling under guilt or soaring with gratitude?