Four-twenty

"4:20 or 4/20 (pronounced four-twenty) refers to consumption of cannabis and, by extension, a way to identify oneself with cannabis drug subculture." Wikipedia

Prior to the summer of 2000, I would have been a part of this celebration. I would go out of my way to find someone, anyone, who liked to get high and then have a gay ol' time wasting away into an oblivion of muddy thoughts and un-clear thinking.

Now, almost nine years later, I no longer think of getting high, but have a different reason to smile on this day. You see, today marks the one-year anniversary of my baptism. God had captured my heart in the summer of 2000, but it wasn't until about a year ago that I really recognized it. Continue reading and you'll see why. This was my testimony I read at my baptism on 4/20/08:

When I have shared my testimony in the past, I would say something to the effect that I became a Christian at a young age (about 8 years old) because I had an emotional reaction to a traveling evangelist and prayed the sinner’s prayer for Jesus to come into my heart and forgive my sins. I memorized scripture, prayed and went to church.

But as a teenager, I “walked away from the Lord” and didn’t really live for Him. I would go on to say that during my “backslidden” state I lived according to my flesh and not after the Spirit. Then at age 24, I “got my heart right with God.” I’d plug myself into stories like the prodigal son and the lost sheep returning to the fold and yet was missing the reality that I was not “coming back” to anything.

This truth came to me recently. About a month ago, I had a strong desire to share my testimony. I was so excited and enthusiastically “volunteered to the Lord” waiting for the door to open. Now I understand that it was the Spirit of God showing me I needed to evaluate my testimony and hold it in light of scripture.

The Bible makes it clear that when salvation comes we are passed from death to life (Romans 6). We go from slaves to sin to slaves of righteousness (Romans 6). The chains come off as we have been purchased by the precious blood of Christ (Romans 5) and are bound to Him (John 10:28,29). Nothing can separate us from the love of God and we love Him because He first loved us (Romans 8:39, 1 John 4:19). Old things are passed away and all things become new (2 Corinthians 5:17). He chose us by His grace and we had nothing to add to this equation (Ephesians 2:8,9).

Suddenly, I saw that my testimony had a huge flaw. While I can claim all the above statements now, I could not say that of myself before the summer of 2000. The fruit I was bearing was that of an unregenerate heart (Matthew 7:16, 20). I hated the things of the Lord. I loved my sin and worldly lifestyle. I didn’t desire to live for Him.

This has been a startling realization. How arrogant of me to say that I walked away from God and then came back to him-as if I could come and go in my service to Him; even though I remembered that time and place of saying a prayer. I guess I wanted to say that I’d been a “Christian” for X number of years, as if that would earn me some sort of plague on the proverbial wall of heaven or receive approving head nods from the Christian community.

I can now testify without any doubt or misconstrued views of God that He saved me! Jesus bore MY wrath so I could live for HIS glory (Romans 5:9,11, Romans 3:25, 1 John 2:2, 1 John 4:10). He gave me a new heart, new desires, a new purpose. So it’s not a question of do you know the time and place but when did God change your heart? I’ve been changed and I had nothing to do with it.

Getting baptized today is an outward sign of an inward cleansing and who cares that it’s 8 years later.

Looking back on this testimony, I realize a lot more can be said. I'd like to create an on-going story, and this is a good place to start.

I praise God for His work in my life through His Spirit as I'm pointed back to my Savior.

Glory to God in the highest!